I’m doing really well with my new loose routine. Everything is a lot more fluid depending on how I feel or what’s going on and my stress levels have reduced for sure.

Not that I was too stressed before to be honest, but less stress is still better!

Instead of me being rigid Monday is CHEST, Wednesday LEGS, bla bla bla. Now I just do chest and then whenever day works best that I have time, I’ll continue and do legs next.

This week I’ve been perfect at going to the gym or running everyday. Feels good.

I’ve recently went through my whole stretching routine and updated parts that felt outdated or needed to change and omg.

I’m fucking feeling the difference. It’s amazing.

I’ve been doing a poor hamstring stretch for sooo loooooong.
I didn’t even realize how bad of shape I was in until I did squats today and realized how fucking smooth it was moving that bar up and down. Jesus.

No more shoulder pain on thumbless squat grip, you know why? Because I’ve been stretching my shoulder daily for like a month now.

The body blows my mind.

—————-

I went to a fancy smancy shoe shop today to find out what new running shoes to get. All the shoes were around $150

I felt bad because they talked to me for over an hour and showed me so many cool things about my feet with their equipment and let me try on so many shoes just for me to leave after buying a 10$ little stress relief ball.

But I learned a lot.
Thanks.

I’ve added another tip in the goal to eliminate my knee problems.
Stop overstriding. Baby steps…everywhere…
This is going to be so tough to change…I love long strides…even when walking…ughhhh.

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Don’t got shit of importance to say, but it’s a sunday night so writing anyway.

I’m happy and my body is doing quite well, so that’s good.

I hung out with another human being for about 95% of friday and Saturday.
AND I did this WITHOUT feeling shitty and having a headache.
Shoutout, shoutout.

Friday I just followed one of my long lost homegirls around town, she’s been living it up in south africa for the past year. I’m kinda dissapointed she has returned in the same lost state I’m used to her being it. Always crying over a boy. Some things never change I guess. Stay strong friend.

One thing I’m confused on is this girl was balling af for unknown reasons and now ????. It appears the money is not there? She went from a freaking high rise condo drake rapped about in one of his songs to a little freakn hole in the wall apartment where her car already got ransacked?? It’s like 3x smaller than her last 1bedroom, I’m not exaggerating.

None of my business though.

Saturday was supposed to be my 2nd attempt at a date night with a stranger lol.
But of course, magically, my old love & co hit me up for the first time ever asking if I wanna meet up right now and I was already close by sooooooo
Totes went and chilled with them instead.

No ReGrEts.
Sorry stranger internet girl.

I went to take pictures at cool abandoned stadium that morning. I didn’t really likE the group of people that much, I thought id be like 3 people, nah it was like 9, but it was fun regardless.

Friend must of told em’ I talk to a lot of girls so upon arrival all they kept saying were “but where the bitches at?”
Imagine if I did bring my friends because I was going thinking it’d be chillNsmall……would of regretted instantly.

PhotoGrApHY fUccBoiiiss

Still working on the kneeeeees. I think I’m doing good still though, just going to take time to until their so healthy I won’t even think to comment on them.

I’m happy today, I think I know why this time. I mean, I cleaned the hell out of everything slowly these past few days, and that helps a lot. Clean sheets, all laundry done, clean bathroom, vacuumed floors, swept kitchen, CLEAN COUNTERS, EMPTY SINK, ahhhhhhhhHHHHHHH

Cleaning. The joy.

Oh and I finally trimmed ma face myself. That was mentally bogging me down a lot. Everyday I would be screaming at myself, “just do it” and then get in the bathroom and be scared of the chance of that awful razer burn coming back and leave.

So far no pain…but it could still arise a little later….fingers crossed all is good…

I might look ugly but I don’t think I even care, I just happy that I took the step lol. I’ll focus on looks next time. I’m always ugly by my standards, it’s okay.

I’m in that real nice zen mode, not the typical “tryhard chris” zen mode.

But a more refreshing version that’s more like “live for yourself and nothing really matters”

It’s relaxing.

Rehabilitation

I played in that semi-competitive ultimate game last weekend, and it hit me that I had some glaring weak spots that just weren’t present before.

My knees ached on every fucking step.

I spent all week researching what I had to do and have started applying fucking all of them at once in efforts to bring my knee back to fucking life

– I got lazy with my stretching these past few months, so I’m back to doing my daily 30-45min routine before bed.

– I do these weird step-up exercises that borderline feel pointless yet helps my knee feel better by strengthening a small quad muscle called the VMO.

– I started dead-lifting again to counteract the fact I’ve only been squatting recently so my
quads have been overpowering my hams, thus putting extra stress on my knees.

– I get up and walk around my office every 30 minutes or so instead of sitting for 8hours straight.

And I’m glad to say after playing today, it’s clearly working.
The body is truly amazing.

Even driving was starting to make my knee ache but I’m healing now.
God bless, god bless.

——————————–

I was really stressed today.
I can’t pinpoint the exact reason, although I do have a lot on my mind.
I guess I got the feeling back where it felt like I am running out of time.
Like I need to stop wasting time and hurry up and do something!!! Despite the fact that I’ve been working hard and progressing.

But in my head, healing myself isn’t really seen as progressing, it’s seen as a fixing a mess of bad habits I should of never had in the first place.

Whatever, writing and stretching has finally helped to clear the headache.

I’m ready for my cycle to hit the burnout stage and I just watch anime and movies for a week. I have so many downloaded right now. Just still not in the mood!

Ugh, off days. Something is still just freaking off.
Idk man, idk.

….I can’t end the post on that negative note. It’s like ruining the stress relieving point of writing this.

Everything is okay even if I feel funny loser. Life is good. Enjoy your weekend. Don’t stress out over nothing you young child.

(So much better)

Chi -> Atl

I played in some non-pickup frisbee(proper formations) for the first time today in about…. 1 whole year maybe? and it was with baddies and I was still messing up left and right…so rusty….

It felt good to get in that real zen competitive mode again after getting beat. That stuff is the ish. When you no longer care how tired you are, or what your legs feel like or what my teammates are trying to say to me. I’m just fucking focused. It’s pure bliss tbh.

I really gotta get my cardio up. I gotta chill on the weights.
Kinda silly rn, I jump high and run fast, but I just don’t last.

——————-

Logging some events because I already forgot everything that happened this weekend. It was fucking packeddd with my homeboy coming back home.

Friday was nice, most of the people got together and we hit the bars.

Honestly….. I don’t remember too much of that night even right now as I’m fucking trying to think on it. I’m wondering if I was a little more drunk then I was aware of at the time….

I was actually drinking vodka instead of my usual sipping on coronas so probably true?

Anyway I’m pretty sure it was just really chill and that we just ran around bars laughing and taking pictures and shit. The few things I do remember is me repeatedly pulling my friends ribbon off because it was funny how she tied it around her belly for her outfit
( sorry )
AND THAT BOMB ASS PIZZA WE GOT NEXT DOOR GOD DAMN I NEVER FELT SO SATISFIED IN MY LIFE EATN THAT SHIT.
I coulda been buyn that shit after every turnup out there, fuck.

—–

Saturday

We fucking woke up fucking starved and then proceeded to make the poorest decision ever of waiting 2hrs for other friends to arrive for brunch and THEN wait 2 more hours as the first place was too packed and the 2nd took forever to make our fucking food.

This also involved getting trapped in a parking garage for 5-10mins until some random lady saved us.

Afterwards I went to the park with the two ladies to “workout” but I really just walked on the trail with them, ( I never been, it’s not bad, I like it ), and then forced them to throw the frisbee with me for a bit. But it was very nice, the weather was seriously perfect.

Then sushi next door where the waitress is frikkin bae

Finally we ended on running it old school and seeing our trio. Unfortunately, it was only a genuine enjoyable experience talking with two of them. The third is now always high and I’d be lying if I didn’t say it feels like I lost my friend to a drug despite it being a okay drug to use and all. Don’t know what to say here…..as long as she’s happy I guess?

We past out early as fuck…I think before it even hit midnight.

———

Sunday

Homie was planning on just leaving to another friends place but that didn’t work out so we reverted back to original plan and I brought him back to visit my fam. That was nice, seeing fam is always nice of course.

Found out my brother is leaving me soon and that’s kinda crazy. He’s always been at home. Always. Don’t know how I’m gonna handle that. Visiting home won’t be the same
😦

We got groceries for the fam and they helped me washed my car I’ve been putting off for so many months now….thanks.

then I expected just a chill night with quiet talking for a bit before seeing him off but that is not what happened. 3 people turned to like 8 or so and then alcohol started being pulled out and lol.

Impromptu mini-kickback.

It ended with this new game I’ve heard they played once before which they called mountain(?) aka inappropriate action telephone. Lots of kisses, crouch hits and boob grabs among others. We agreed we were acting like such high schoolers…..and still continued playing for another hour lol. I was entertained.

————-

10/10 weekend overall.
I can’t keep that kind of pace up on the regular, but do come back some months after I recover so we can run it back lol.

I’m saltier than expected at having to buy tires. Life giveth only to taketh.
I can’t keep a penny locked down for nothing.

The maintenance cost for breathing is too damn high.

My face no longer itches to kingdom come and back. This is a huge relief. Razor rash or whatever it call was the worst ever these few weeks.

Hopefully when I finally try shaving with all the proper products I bought, it’ll be without the painful bumps.

I’m still happy with my day-to-day life.

But I do hope I find a greater purpose.
This can’t be it for my goals.

I know most people spend their whole life trying to find purpose only to end as lost as they started.

But there’s gotta be something I care about more than the rest.

What is it.

parties

Just logging some events in for the books.

I finally made that work lunch happen, it took 2 weeks to finally make it happen, but it happened. ( lol happen x 3 )

That was a lot of fun, It was supposed to be especially for the 2 new co-workers but both of them couldn’t make it! So it was just me and 2 others who joined around when I did. I can’t tell how old the girl is but I know she has 2 kids, she’s really cool though. I want to say….24….but we also graduated @ the same college during the same years. How the hell did she do that and pop out two kids, is she a god. I must be off. Hella.

The dude is a big weeb but he is also really cool! He’s been to Japan and stuff, only for a week, but he is really into that stuff. He’s watched 131 days worth of anime, compared to my 27 days! And I feel like I watch a lot of anime! hahahah. We exchanged numbers, My first official co-worker friend at this job. The number makes it real. Now I’ve made 1 friend in 2 out of 4 jobs.

——

Friday night was a mess, I went to my friends birthday party and it was like a small event but….Everybody at that party threw up / blacked out at some point aside from me. Like wtf. They just wouldn’t stop taking shots….I’m like…no…this is…so…stupid…please…

One girl especially! I literally tried to stop her because these girls all weigh like 80 and she was throwing down any fucking shot given to her without any 2nd thought and I fucking knew she was going to die. ( My efforts were in vain, she threw them back too fast )

lol. I’m not even writing anymore about this. So many sloppy moments. just lol. A lot of blacked out making out and questionable actions behind closed doors.

It was nice meeting my friends friend he always talks to me about though. They were cool before they died.

———

Saturday night was alright, I’m pretty sure the average age of the room was around 23 yet it devolved into a awful shitty throwback to old school college parties of asking shitty questions to try to pry into eachother’s lives and get dirt on eachother between shots.

It was pretty chill while all the ladies were there though, but everyone left around midnight as usual nowadays ( aint nobody wanna turnup no more, I feel them, those days are gone )

The problem was I was wide awake since I napped hella earlier so I decided to stay around since I had nothing better to do at that time. Sitting in on a 1:7(?) girl to guy ratio for 3 hours was mind-numbing.

————-

It’s weird, I don’t really have too much fun at these events, but I enjoy going when they happen just for the contrast of the stable predictable week.

————

Back to the grind, back to the grind.
Feeln good, feeln great.